Don't blame ME!

   29:3 NIV

Don't Blame Me by Pat Nordman   "Then they gave me the gold, and I threw it into the fire, and out came this calf!"  Exodus 32:24b

How preposterous! "You know the people. . .that they are prone to evil" v.22. Aaron said nothing about the mold he made or the graving tool he used. Aaron blamed society and we're still doing it. Give the crowd what they want and then blame them when the gold and what we in our finite wisdom thought was good for them finally destroys them. Actually, our progenitor Adam started the blame game: "The man said, `The woman you put here with me --she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it'" Genesis 3:12. Eve took it from there. We have all sinned--and we have all blamed nature and them. "They" made us do it. Society makes us murderers and adulterers because it makes such stringent laws, so we reason. Moses literally broke the commandments in indignation at the sin he witnessed; we break God's commandments in indignation that our so-called freedom is curtailed and then we blame others when that so-called freedom grows a bumper crop of unexpected problems. "But they all alike began to make excuses" Luke 14:18. Everyone does it, so it can't be too wrong for us to do it; We're victims of a corrupt society; God put us in the furnace of affliction and we came out burned. At one time, children's shirts were sold that had emblazoned on them, "The devil made me do it." That's as good an excuse as all the others combined. Someone described an alibi as an excuse that's cooked up, but is always half-baked. Benjamin Franklin made a couple of observations that have stood the test of time and human nature: "The absent are never without fault, nor the present without excuse" and "He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else."

We have all sinned--and we have all blamed nature and them. "They" made us do it...

We mourn the passing of our dear friend, Common Sense

I posted this a year ago, but it makes so much sense I decided to repost it. I received this gem from one of my email buddies - thanks, Curt!

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Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;

- Why the early bird gets the worm;
- Life isn't always fair;
- And maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student, but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses, and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death:

-by his parents, Truth and Trust,

-by his wife, Discretion,
-by his daughter, Responsibility,
-and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 5 stepbrothers;

- I Know My Rights

- I Want It Now
- Someone Else Is To Blame
- I'm A Victim
- Pay me for Doing Nothing

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

Caught in the middle!

"Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil" (Proverbs
4:27); "Each one went straight ahead. Wherever the spirit would go, they would
go, without turning as they went" (Ezekiel 12:1).

Apparently extremes aren't good for spiritual health. If we lean too much on the
side of severity, we can become harsh and intolerant; if we lean too much to the
other side, we may wind up accommodating wrongdoing without realizing it. Mercy
and justice are the two sides of God's coin and that coin becomes both a just
and merciful standard for our lives. God asks that we merge good nature with
fixed spiritual principles, and that will be the stamp, the seal, the coin, for
our life.

Dwight D. Eisenhower noted: "People talk about the middle of the road as though
it were unacceptable. Actually, all human problems, excepting morals, come into
the gray areas. Things are not all black and white. There have to be
compromises. The middle of the road is all the usable surface. The extremes,
right and left, are in the gutters." The gutters are fanaticism and
indifference. It is in the middle where we find the steady people.

Benjamin Franklin said about the gray areas of life: "When confronted with two
courses of action, I jot down on a piece of paper all the arguments in favor of
each one. Then, by weighing the arguments pro and con and canceling them out one
against the other, I take the course indicated by what remains." There are
legitimate gray areas of life when it is a good idea to do this. It's choosing
the better of two goods when two options are equally honorable.

Cartwright observed that "Some flee the cross; others make one." The middle
course is at the foot of the cross!

Situation Ethics and its Aftermaths!

"Where there is no vision, the people perish. But he that keeps the law, happy is he" (Proverbs 29:18, KJV).

I am a great believer in the Book of Proverbs. If there is one book that would wipe away situation ethics, it is surely this one. As I understand it, situation ethics is nothing more then getting, after demanding, our own way. As for the law, what law? We have managed to wipe out any vestige of personal law. Why, anyone can sue for the least reason now. I am amazed at the anthills of complaints that pile up and up and up.

A number of years ago I taught Proverbs to our preteens at church; I can only pray that at least one of these young souls learned that life comes with obligations, and it isn't to his or her eternal shame to act like it. I tried to impress upon these precious souls that these rules we all so abhor are actually fences to protect us, not barriers to our fun in life. As I said to a young fellow one day, if there were no rules on the road, we'd be road-kill.

"Let the wise listen and add to their learning" (Proverbs 1:5). First, we must shut out the noise! Mrs. Fanatic here has been on a campaign for years to get our minds into our quiet space and THINK. Ohoh, think? Turn off the television if you want a vision! And then the phones and the blackberries and the radios and the computers - anything that's a distraction, which is just about everything these daze.

Ralph Waldo Emerson stated: "At times the whole world seems to be in conspiracy to importune you with emphatic trifles. Friend, client, child, sickness, fear, want, charity, all knock at once at thy closet door and say, 'Come out unto us.'" The world is knocking with clutter of mind and body. Trivial Pursuit is the name of today's game. We must decide for ourselves what is important, and then shut the door to the rubbish, which increases by the minute.

"Discretion will guard [us]" (Proverbs 2:11) so that we may divide the wheat from the chaff and the essential from the ever-increasing non-essentials.

Getting a Grip on Our Gripes

"Do everything without complaining or arguing" (Philippians 2:14).

“The dogs bark, but the caravan moves on" (Arabic Proverb). "Things cannot always go your way. Learn to accept in silence the minor aggravations, cultivate the gift of taciturnity and consume your own smoke with an extra draught of hard work, so that those about you may not be annoyed with the dust and soot of your complaints" (William Osler).

It's a long step from complainant to complaisance. The physician Dr. Edward Trudeau had tuberculosis and his approach was, "I have found that the great word is Acquiescence." Sophisticated folks have a hard time acquiescing to anything, much less everything.

Disraeli, when Prime Minister of England, was known to have an excellent memory. Someone asked him one day how he managed to remember all those names and faces. "When I meet a man whose name I cannot remember, I give myself two minutes; then if it is a hopeless case, I always say: `And how is the old complaint'?" And asking some people, "How are you?" can ruin our day. Disraeli is also quoted as having said, "Never complain and never explain." Self-justification fans just as many fires as criticisms and grievances.

A strap hanger is one who has a complaint of long-standing. The word strap has many definitions. Among many meanings, the noun means belt and the verb means beat. So we can wind up belting ourselves and beating others with complaints. If the complaint is long-standing, we then shoulder the heavy epithet of strap hanger. Proverbs 25:17 wisely teaches, "Seldom set foot in your neighbor's house--too much of you, and he will hate you." This is especially true if we go there with nothing but grievances. We'd best get a grip on our gripes!

Decisiveness, Positiveness and Stubborness

"Multitudes, multitudes in the valley of decision!" (Joel 3:14 NKJV).

Many relationships falter on stubbornness. Graves have been dug with the words, "I'm right." I had a relative who was always right – absolutely, retroactively right, even when she wasn't there and you were! She also died at a young age, poor soul. Bless her, she spent her short, insecure life proving every nit-picking point. It would have been the end of her warped world to have been proven wrong. Perhaps definitions are in order here:

1. decisiveness;

2. positiveness; and
3. stubbornness.

Decisiveness is the ability to come to a decision, make an effective choice and mentally resolve a conflict. The indecisive person lives in constant fear of consequences and is unable to handle his problems efficiently. The decisive person takes responsibility for his or her actions. Mr. or Ms. Indecisive points to others as the source of his/her unhappiness, too.

Positiveness is an extension of decisiveness: the person takes a firm stand on a decision and rules out mistakes and doubts. This person is often accused of being stubborn when in effect he has simply made up his mind on a conviction he feels is legitimate after he has thoroughly researched and thought out the problem. This person's convictions are firm, confident and, to him, logical. Of course if the person is strong-willed and narrow-minded and ungenerous, then he will be accused of being stubborn, justly so at times, too.

But the stubborn person! These folks are right come high water, the Bible, the Encyclopedia, and 50 million lawyers to prove them wrong. This person resists, whether his or her reasons are valid or not. The adamant person can't stand to lose face; ergo, s/he is always right, which is ludicrous, for who can be always absolutely right? The last I checked, Jesus was/is the only perfect Person.

On the other hand, the healthily positive person is willing to listen to reason and change his/her mind. This person is willing to change thoughts and feelings if, upon reanalysis of the situation, basic convictions are not compromised. The really confident person will concede a point to common sense, whereas the obstinate person concedes nothing. This person does not possess an opinion – it possesses him/her! Unfortunately the "always-right" person dies by degrees from loneliness. After all, who wants to be proven wrong all the time?

 

 

Go to the Ant!

“Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise! It has no commander, no overseer or ruler, yet it stores its provisions in summer and gathers its food at harvest” (Proverbs 6:6-9).

The tiny ant teaches us many lessons:

1) It is self-motivated and highly industrialized. The ant doesn't need another to make sure it gets its work done.

2) It collects its food in the proper seasons; it is prudent.
3) It is fond of its young, and takes care of them.
4) It has foresight for others and shows kindness.
5) It works quietly without show and until the work is done. In this, it teaches us perseverance.
6) It works in cooperation and organization with others. In union there is indeed strength.
7) It keeps its home meticulously clean.
8) It knows its job and does it.
9) The ant has initiative, that wonderful virtue of resourcefulness that knows the how and when.

God is the God of nature, and it's amazing how even the smallest creatures can teach us such great lessons. We human beings can learn diligence, how to recognize opportunities, and individual initiative from the ant. "As long as it is day, we must do the work of him who sent me" (John 9:4). The foreseeing person is a foregoing person. Sometimes we have to forego, or sacrifice, a pleasure today so we can realize a goal tomorrow. This is true in both the spiritual and material realm.

Stephen Vincent Benet said: "The ant finds kingdoms in a foot of ground." Perhaps this says to us that, even in our small area of life, we can find our sphere of contentment! Each of us has our own job to do in our sphere, responsibilities which we can't hand over to others. Rest is a reward after we have done our job. Aldegonde, coadjutor of William of Orange, is said to have for a motto, "Repos aillerus," or "Rest elsewhere." If the farmer rested because it was cold or windy, when he should be sowing and plowing, few of us would eat.

"I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours. I love to keep it by me: the idea of getting rid of it nearly breaks my heart" (Jerome K. Jerome). God does help those who help themselves but even the starving must walk to the table! Of course if they are crippled, we help them; otherwise, it's best to encourage others to help themselves. After major surgery, the doctor forces the patient to get up and walk. If the patient lay there until s/he felt like getting up, the person would never do so. Sometimes we must force ourselves to get going in life.