And the Lord said unto Noah, "Where is the ark which I commanded you to
And Noah said unto the Lord: "Verily, I have had three carpenters off
sick. The gopher wood supplier hath let me down, yea, even though the
gopher wood hath been on order for six months. What canst I do, O Lord?"
And God said unto Noah, "I want that ark finished within seven days."
And Noah said, "It will be so."
But it was not so. And the Lord said unto Noah, "What seemeth to be the
trouble this time?"
And Noah said unto the Lord: "Mine subcontractor hath gone bankrupt. The
pitch which Thou commandest me to put on the outside of the ark hath not
arrived. The plumber and his crew have gone on strike. Lord, I am
And the Lord grew angry and said: "What about the animals, the male and
female of every sort that I ordered to come unto thee to keep their seed
alive upon the face of the earth?"
And Noah said, "They have been delivered unto the wrong address, but
they should arrive on Friday."
And the Lord God said, "How about the unicorns and the fowls of the air,
And Noah wrung his hands and wept, saying, "Lord, unicorns are a
discontinued line; thou canst not find them anywhere. And fowls of the
air are sold only in half-dozen lots. Lord, Lord, thou knowest how it
And the Lord in his wisdom said, "Noah, my son, I knowest. Why else dost
thou think I would cause a flood to descend upon the earth?"